Words from a Jesus Freak

We asked our cast and crew to contribute posts on the subject of marriage equality and how they related. This is one of them.

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Hi, I’m a Christian. I love Jesus, pray, take communion, lift up a joyful noise to the Lord in worship and abstain from drugs and premarital sex. I’m an Actor. I curse on stage and wear revealing costumes and I do kissing scenes with men who aren’t my fiancé.

I also believe in Marriage Equality.

Growing up, I was a Christian that I openly admit, am thoroughly embarrassed about now. I wore the Jesus t-shirts (some gems include “Jesus is my boyfriend!” “I’m not afraid to tell the world that I love Jesus.” “I sing for a reason, I sing for Jesus” and last but not least, “Abortion is homicide.”) I listened to strictly Christian music (I’m lookin’ at you, Rebecca St. James) and while others saved up for Warped Tour, I was saving up for CreationFest at the Gorge. I had the Jesus license plate frame that says “Got Jesus?” (Which ironically is still there-those suckers are difficult to get off!) I cringe when I think about my former self. I still love Jesus, but I understand Him a whole lot better now. My best friend from HS told me recently, “I just really have a heart for homosexuals.” My immediate reaction was “People. You mean PEOPLE, right? You have a heart for people.” It was in that moment that I realized we were different. We did everything in the world together, prayed and wept and laughed together. But it wasn’t until that particular moment that I realized: we were different Christians. I don’t think the goal is to get to Heaven, and have Jesus say to you, “You judged all the people I wanted you to hate, good job.” I hope He’ll say, “You loved all the people I wanted you to love, good job.”

I may cringe at the Christian I used to be, but Jesus Christ is still my Lord and Savior, so I often feel like a minority in the theater community. No I don’t live with my fiancé, yes that’s a purity ring on my finger, no I don’t want to smoke weed in the green room and lastly, I can’t rehearse on Easter Sunday. I have been excluded from cast parties, heard whispered insults, the epic backstage discussions as to how all religious people are prudes and bigots and hypocrites and liars—all in front of the one Christian in the room. Don’t they realize that there are different Christians?

I wanted to be a part of this piece because I want our community to realize that not all Christians are the enemy. There are some Christians, like myself, who are different. I’m not praying for you-I’m rooting for you.